Ortiz Bowl
The Ortiz Bowl is a family NFL fantasy football competition David organized for his family. The inaugural competition, dubbed Ortiz Bowl I, was held during the 2022 NFL season, and successive competitions have been held each year since. The competition is fierce, with champions claiming bragging rights for the remainder of the year, and all vanquished competitors offering them their due reverence.
Competitors
A number of competitors have taken part in the Ortiz Bowl league over the seasons. A summary of competitors can be found below. (Note: An asterisk next to a year indicates that this individual participated as a co-manager in the given year. Win/loss totals are for the regular season only and do not include playoff or consolation bracket performance.)
| Name | Years Competed | Wins | Losses | % | Best Finish | Championships | Footstools |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Curran Beljajev | 2022, 2023 | 17 | 11 | .607 | 3rd Place | 0 | 0 |
| George Beljajev | 2022, 2023 | 19 | 9 | .679 | 5th Place | 0 | 0 |
| Welles Beljajev | 2023* | 11 | 3 | .786 | 4th Place | 0 | 0 |
| Weston Beljajev | 2022, 2023* | 22 | 6 | .786 | 1st Place | 1 | 0 |
| Natalie Ishii | 2022, 2023 | 9 | 19 | .474 | 8th Place | 0 | 0 |
| Sandi Ishii | 2022*, 2023 | 14 | 14 | .500 | 2nd Place | 0 | 0 |
| Steve Ishii | 2022, 2023 | 10 | 18 | .556 | 3rd Place | 0 | 1 |
| Anne Ortiz | 2022*, 2023 | 12 | 16 | .429 | 7th Place | 0 | 0 |
| Ben Ortiz | 2023* | 2 | 12 | .143 | 14th Place | 0 | 1 |
| Codi Ortiz | 2022, 2023 | 10 | 18 | .357 | 10th Place | 0 | 0 |
| Ryan Ortiz | 2022, 2023 | 12 | 16 | .429 | 6th Place | 0 | 0 |
| David Peterson | 2022, 2023 | 22 | 6 | .786 | 1st Place | 1 | 0 |
| Erin Peterson | 2022, 2023 | 11 | 17 | .393 | 7th Place | 0 | 0 |
| Jessie Peterson | 2022, 2023 | 11 | 17 | .393 | 6th Place | 0 | 0 |
| Teri Vasquez | 2023* | 2 | 12 | .143 | 14th Place | 0 | 1 |
Results
| Edition | Year | Ortiz Bowl | Third Place Match | Number of teams | ||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Champion | Score | Runner-up | Third place | Score | Fourth place | |||
| Ortiz Bowl I | 2022 | (2) Pop Lockett Drop It (Weston Beljajev) |
147.26–96.78 | (1) California Cats (David Peterson) |
(5) I like tacos (Curran Beljajev) |
110.50–104.50 | (3) Dodgers Suck (Andrew Bienias) |
12 |
| Ortiz Bowl II | 2023 | (2) California Cats (David Peterson) |
160.65–110.97 | (4) RAHvengers (Sandi Ishii) |
(6) Anaheim Steamrollers (Steve Ishii) |
180.65–164.25 | (1) Allergic to Cheese Ortiz (Weston & Welles Beljajev) |
14 |
Teams reaching the top four
After the conclusion of each Ortiz Bowl championship game, the champion receives the championship trophy. Starting with Ortiz Bowl II, entry fees were divided up, with a percentage going to the first place (60%), second place (25%), and third place (15%) finishers. (Note: Years with an asterisk denote that the participant was a co-manager.)
| Team | Champions | Runners-up | Third place | Fourth place | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| David Peterson | 1 (2023) | 1 (2022) | – | – | 2 |
| Weston Beljajev | 1 (2022) | – | – | 1 (2023*) | 2 |
| Sandi Ishii | - | 1 (2023) | – | – | 1 |
| Curran Beljajev | - | – | 1 (2022) | – | 1 |
| Steve Ishii | - | – | 1 (2023) | – | 1 |
| Welles Beljajev | - | – | – | 1 (2023*) | 1 |
| Andrew Bienias | - | – | – | 1 (2022) | 1 |
Scoring leaders
Winning or losing depends on who you happen to be playing, but one's overall score remains for the course of the entire season. Below are the teams that scored the most points throughout the regular season, regardless of record.
| Edition | Year | Team | Manager(s) | Points Scored | Record | Result |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Ortiz Bowl I | 2022 | I like tacos | Curran Beljajev | 2,154.86 | 8-6 | 3rd Place |
| Ortiz Bowl II | 2023 | Allergic to Cheese Ortiz | Weston & Welles Beljajev | 2,187.70 | 11-3 | 4th Place |
Coaching rating leaders
There are many games where you say, "Well, if I would've started this guy on my bench, I would've won!" Fair enough, but the best coach will be able to predict which of their players is going to have the best game. The coaching rating takes a team's actual lineups and compares them to their best possible lineup each week and determines the difference. The best possible rating is 0 (i.e. you started the best possible lineup every week), which is nearly impossible to achieve, so the closer one can get to zero, the better. Below is a list of the best managers for each season determined by coaching rating. (Note: Stats currently unavailable for the 2022 season.)
| Edition | Year | Team | Manager(s) | Coaching Rating | Record | Result |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Ortiz Bowl I | 2022 | — | — | — | — | — |
| Ortiz Bowl II | 2023 | RAHvengers | Sandi Ishii | ˗111.17 | 9-5 | 2nd Place |
The Hard Luck Hamster
Unlike a real football game, the team you're playing has no affect on your own team's performance, meaning a loss during a given week may have been a win against some other team had the matchups been different. For example, in the very first game of the first edition of the Ortiz Bowl, the California Cats lost to Dodgers suck by a score of 173.28 to 115.42. It was a lopsided loss, but had the California Cats been playing the WGG Dogz (99.00), Teeth (102.70), Mountain Raige (110.56), or Nacho Cheese Ortiz (115.08) that week, they would have won. Consequently, the loss was poor luck, having been matched up against someone who happened to score better that week.
As a result of the way the competition works, one team will have the bad fortune of seemingly being matched up against a team having their best week every week. Their losses may owe more to the schedule than their own performance, and for that reason, the team that gives up the most points during the regular season is awarded with the Hard Luck Hamster in recognition of their incredibly poor luck.
| Edition | Year | Team | Manager(s) | Points Surrendered | Points Above Average | Record | Result |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Ortiz Bowl I | 2022 | Colorful Flowers | Erin Peterson | 1,965.96 | +146.54 | 5-9 | 7th Place |
| Ortiz Bowl II | 2023 | Gnoble Gnomes | Jessie Peterson | 2,086.04 | +231.24 | 4-10 | 13th Place |
The Footstool
The last place finisher wins the dreaded Footstool, so called for being the thing the winner rests their feet on. During the first season of the Ortiz Bowl league, the winner of the Footstool got to create a new rule for the league. In future seasons, it seems likely that the last place finisher will get to choose their position in the draft, barring expansion.
| Edition | Year | Team | Managers | Record | Number of teams |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Ortiz Bowl I | 2022 | Anaheim Steamrollers | Steve Ishii | 2-12 | 12 |
| Ortiz Bowl II | 2023 | COrtizeses | Ben Ortiz & Teri Vasquez | 2-12 | 14 |
Championship Trophy
Sandi Ishii created the championship trophy to be awarded each season of the Ortiz Bowl league. It depicts a person in a football helmet reclining in a reclining chair and sports the plaque "Ortiz Bowl League Champion". The trophy is passed from champion to champion each season. The shape of the trophy gave rise to the nickname for the last place finisher each year: The Footstool.